Last week I helped out with a kids holiday program. I just took really bad photos and helped if I was needed elsewhere. But all throughout the week I was scared and thought anyone could do a better job than me. I survived last week and this week Here I Am Anyway by Josh Wilson from Carry Me (2013), reminded me why I was there.

I’m like Moses in the desert,
When that bush went up in flames,
You said, Go and tell your story,
He said, God, what will I say,
I’m so scared, unprepared,
What difference will I make,
Sometimes I feel the same…

Sometimes is more like all the time for me.

If it’s weakness that You want,
I’ve got more than enough,
Some days I am so afraid,
To show this world your love,
I’ll give You all of me,
And my insecurities,
God I don’t have what it takes,
But here I am anyway,
Here I am anyway.

I was at the program to serve the kids, the other leaders and God. I was there in a position where God can use my life to bring Himself glory. Even though I was scared, terrified at times, I pray God uses it for His glory.

God, I’ve got so many questions,
Wonder why You placed me here,
You have given me these passions,
But they come with so much fear,
Sometimes it don’t make sense at all,
But I guess if I was brave,
Then I wouldn’t walk by faith…

Three side notes here:
I love when songs reference other songs. I never know if the reference is deliberate though. Anyway, there is a song called Walk By Faith by Jeremy Camp.

I’ve listened to a few other Josh Wilson albums during the week and noticed that the feeling of inadequacy or fear is common in his songs.

This video is an acoustic version. There’s is a bit of talk at the start, but they don’t hold up the song long.

Here I Am Anyway – Josh Wilson